Anger problems? A glance to the inside

Sometimes I get angry. There are things that annoy me, from small things to big things. Sometimes I have taken that anger out on my own family, out on my wife and sons, and I have fallen into blaming them for that anger. Many years ago I corrected that mistake. 

Many say, "You made me angry," because they think that what that person did or said was what caused their anger. They are wrong. The anger was in them, and what that person did or said was their excuse for it to be manifested.

To take care of my family's heart, I have told them that they are not to blame for my reaction, my anger, that what they said or did did not make me angry, that with the years, I have allowed the anger to be in me and that I am the one who has to change. The fact that what they said or did was wrong does not justify my anger. What they did or said can be corrected without getting angry.

They didn't make me angry, I'm the only one responsible for it. To think that they have to stop doing or saying that in order for me not to get angry is merely a way of justifying myself and not taking responsibility for my anger.

When the prophet Nathan came to King David, he spoke to him with a little story. He told him that there was a man who had two sons, and they were so poor that their only possession was a little sheep which they raised as part of the family. There was also a very rich man, with thousands of sheep, who offered a feast to a visitor who came to him, but instead of taking one of his many sheep for food, he took the poor man's only little sheep.

When David heard that, the Bible says that his anger was kindled against that rich man and he said that he deserves to die and that he must pay the poor man with interest. At that moment, Nathan tells him, "You are that man" (2 Samuel 12:1-17).

Notice this: Everything that angered David was inside him. The only reason David was angry with the rich man was because he saw himself reflected in him. And the same happens with us.

Anger is just a way of expressing annoyance and/or disagreement with something. Other people express it differently: frustration, impatience, stress, despair, and they reflect it with unforgiveness, silent treatment, rudeness, yelling, hitting, etc.

So, the first step to being free from anger is, without a doubt, to RECOGNIZE THAT YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR GETTING ANGRY.

Stop blaming your husband or wife, children, the government, what happened to you or what they did to you, your boss, some circumstance, etc., and start taking responsibility for yourself, for your own attitudes and reactions, and you will see that, little by little, as you learn to find the help you need in the presence of your heavenly Father and in His Word,  He'll start doing that work that you couldn't for years. Over time, you will no longer be affected by what used to bother you, and you may not even realize it when it happens. Gradually, others will notice and say, "You're different! How did you change?" and you can testify to what Jesus did in you.

I hope it helped you!