The best way to stop doing the wrong

Do you want to change? Do you want to stop doing the wrong that you know you have to quit doing? Surely you've tried for long time to quit that addiction, that bad habit, to change that personality trait that has brought you so many problems, but without good results. I'm gonna give you now the way to stop doing the wrong thing: Do good.

No kidding! The best way to stop doing wrong is doing good!

It's not about of just trying to stop doing wrong things, but of doing good things. That bad habit has to be replaced by other in order for it to disappear, and what's better than by a good habit!

This is not about of just resisting doing bad things. Waiting for that moment of anxiety to come wherein temptation already started to take over the will, just to start saying: "I won't do it! I won't do it! I won't do it!", is an 100% inefficient way. The best way is NEVER ALLOW THAT DESIRE TO START GROWING.

If you analyze the daily life of a person with a bad habit, you'll note that it's all designed for that bad habit to appear and to flourish. That bad habit or addiction didn't just all of a sudden appear out of the thin air with no reason, but it flourished because it's fed by the many decisions that are made in a daily basis. That's why that the best way to be free from that wrong habit is creating a new one.

It's not about to stop doing wrong, but to do good.

It's not a new decision you have to make, but a bunch of it. You have to re-design your life style. It's nonsense to think that doing the same thing you'll obtain different results. That's why your decisions have to aim to create a new life style. For example, make the decision to practice a sport, to create a new group of friends, to take classes of something new, to assist more to your church, to be part of a small group in it, to actively participate in the events it organizes, etc. This kind of decisions will be changing your life style, using the time you used before to cultivate that bad habit to create a new and good one, you'll be surrounding yourself with people that will naturally help you to go to that new direction because they are going to that same direction!

By doing so, in time, you'll realize that you won't be worrying for not doing that bad thing, but for doing new good things. You'll note that bad thing you used to do will be a past thing, you won't remember how you quit doing it, because your focus will have changed, because you won't be worried on destroying the bad thing, but on building a good one.

I hope this may helped you!

An Advice that will help you to get your goals this 2018

If you divide what you want to achieve in 365 parts, I assure you that it'll get much easier. The problem that many people face when they resolve to achieve something is that they see what they want as a whole, and obviously what they see is an impossible-to-achieve goal.

What do you want for this 2018? To loose weight, a better relationship with your kids, with you wife, to be free from an adiction? Whatever it may be, you'll get discourage if you think that achieve your goal consists of just one step. Remember this: NO ACHIEVEMENT IS GOTTEN WITH JUST ONE STEP.

Any feat you want to achieve (or that has been achieved) will require time, sacrifice, care, discipline, perseverance, planing, etc., and obviously you can't apply these on just one day, unless, of course, that you know a person that in one day has lost weigh, gotten a dream marriage, restored his/her children relationship, been free from an addiction, etc.

Just in case, there is no magic pill that will make you to loose weigh without exercising and eating healthy food, and those persons that say to the ones with a great marriage, "how lucky you were to get such a beautiful marriage!", don't know what they're saying, they're wrong, because it cost them YEARS of learning to give in, to forgive, to understand and to sacrifice.

So, more than a goal, see what you want to achieve as a direction for YOUR DAILY STEPS to aim, and these DAILY STEPS, these do have to be your goals! EACH DAY AN INDIVIDUAL GOAL, which altogether will take you to where you want to get.

Learn to find satisfaction in achieving these daily goals, in the little ones, each and every day. Learn to be happy:
- Not only when you got your ideal weigh, but you finished a day of eating healthy and exercising.
- Not only when somebody tells you "how great marriage you have!", but when finished a prayer for your spouse (which is one of the many little steps to get to marriage restoration).
- Not only when you "feel free" from your addiction, but when your day is up and you didn't fall.

Doing this you not only will enjoy the process until you get where you want to go, but also you'll realize that doing exploits isn't something for a few people, but YOU also will feel that can do your own exploit, and you'll know there's nothing you cannot achieve.

Anger problems? A glance to the inside

Sometimes I get angry. There are things that annoy me, from small things to big things. Sometimes I have taken that anger out on my own family, out on my wife and sons, and I have fallen into blaming them for that anger. Many years ago I corrected that mistake. 

Many say, "You made me angry," because they think that what that person did or said was what caused their anger. They are wrong. The anger was in them, and what that person did or said was their excuse for it to be manifested.

To take care of my family's heart, I have told them that they are not to blame for my reaction, my anger, that what they said or did did not make me angry, that with the years, I have allowed the anger to be in me and that I am the one who has to change. The fact that what they said or did was wrong does not justify my anger. What they did or said can be corrected without getting angry.

They didn't make me angry, I'm the only one responsible for it. To think that they have to stop doing or saying that in order for me not to get angry is merely a way of justifying myself and not taking responsibility for my anger.

When the prophet Nathan came to King David, he spoke to him with a little story. He told him that there was a man who had two sons, and they were so poor that their only possession was a little sheep which they raised as part of the family. There was also a very rich man, with thousands of sheep, who offered a feast to a visitor who came to him, but instead of taking one of his many sheep for food, he took the poor man's only little sheep.

When David heard that, the Bible says that his anger was kindled against that rich man and he said that he deserves to die and that he must pay the poor man with interest. At that moment, Nathan tells him, "You are that man" (2 Samuel 12:1-17).

Notice this: Everything that angered David was inside him. The only reason David was angry with the rich man was because he saw himself reflected in him. And the same happens with us.

Anger is just a way of expressing annoyance and/or disagreement with something. Other people express it differently: frustration, impatience, stress, despair, and they reflect it with unforgiveness, silent treatment, rudeness, yelling, hitting, etc.

So, the first step to being free from anger is, without a doubt, to RECOGNIZE THAT YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR GETTING ANGRY.

Stop blaming your husband or wife, children, the government, what happened to you or what they did to you, your boss, some circumstance, etc., and start taking responsibility for yourself, for your own attitudes and reactions, and you will see that, little by little, as you learn to find the help you need in the presence of your heavenly Father and in His Word,  He'll start doing that work that you couldn't for years. Over time, you will no longer be affected by what used to bother you, and you may not even realize it when it happens. Gradually, others will notice and say, "You're different! How did you change?" and you can testify to what Jesus did in you.

I hope it helped you!

Social Networks: "Excuse me, did you say something?"

We are already in the social networks era. Many are thankful for this, some are complaining and there are others that just don't know when to stop using them. Which is your group?

I'm not agree to those that complain about them saying: "There are people that even post their food! I mean, don't they have more important things to post?" I think that these people don't get the idea of what a social network really is. For example, if you are hanging out with your friends, is it really necessary to talk only about very important things? Can't you talk about the daily things of life? Well, a social network is like that gathering, but online. So, if you see somebody that posts something that you don't like, you're free to talk or not about that, but please, don't get angry!, and much less, don't share your anger to the group of people that do like that post!

I'm not agree either with those that ignore people that are physically present because are all the time on their phone checking their social networks. If you are with family at dinner time (to throw an example), your family around you is already your social network. So, put away your cellphone and talk to them, partake of the reunion, you are part of them! Not to talk to them because you're checking your cellphone it is not right. If you want, take a picture of your food and a selfie with them, but to post those photos in that very moment and to answer all the comments of those photos, I think it's too much. That's is ignoring your family, and examples like that are the ones that people that are complaining all the time take to generalize saying that social networks destroy your family, that they have formed a zombie generation, etc.

The social network hasn't destroyed your family. The lack of self control of the person to have balance, did.

The Bible says that there is time for everything (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8). When we do things out of their time, there are problems. But if you look for the help of your Heavenly Father, He will strengthen you  so you can do things in their proper time, and you won't be impatient nor in despair, and you will learn to enjoy the moment.