Invest in your marriage

What do you want to improve in your life? Invest in it. To what you give to, it increases. To what you don't give to, it decreases. Normally we just give to the professional area: school, college, and other studies that usually aim to improve our professional capacity so we can make a good living. That's a necessary thing to do, but most people fail in improving another area that's even more important: marriage.

Many of the problems a family faces, and normally the ones that hurt the most, are in this area; and also it is one that most of us invest in the least, if there is any investment at all. This is one of the main reasons of the failure in marriage nowadays, because to what you don't give to, it decreases.

What's the solution? Invest in your marriage! Because to what you give to, it increases!

Those that enjoy a great marriage, it's not because they were lucky, but because they knew how to invest in it.

How do we invest in our marriage? Reading books, going to seminars, getting a mentor, listening to teachings. Doing all of these is TO GIVE to your marriage, therefore, your marriage will improve, you'll become a better husband/wife. Your spouse and children will thank you!

Do this continually. For example, if you finished a book on how to be a better husband, don't wait a year to start another one! The investment in your marriage has to be constant. Consistency is the key!

Being a better husband/wife is one of the things that's going to give you more fulfillment than any other thing. It's much more rewarding than being successful in your finances. So, in a weekly basis, sacrifice two or three our hours of something, like social media, TV or any other leisure. No having time its a just lame excuse. You do have time! It just matter of wanting it enough.

If you are a husband/wife, or if you are in a relantioship with somebody, or even if you are single dating no one, prepare yourself to be a better husband/wife starting now. Invest yourself in that area. Don't let yourself to be taught by movies, or by friends and family that, even though they want the best for you, they are just going to be telling you things out of their experience, which, in many cases, are not necessarily right. Follow the example and teaching of those that you admire in that area, of those of which you want to be like. Remember this: fill yourself of what you want to come out of you. That knowledge won't come to you by chance, it has to be sought.

Hope it helps!!

¿Por qué cuando oro no pasa nada?

Algo que tenemos que recordar es que cuando oramos SIEMPRE pasa algo. El problema no se encuentra en nuestra oración ni en Dios, sino en nuestra expectativa. ¿Qué es lo que esperamos que suceda cuando oramos? Creo que la mayoría espera inconscientemente que la respuesta VENGA inmediatamente, a las pocas horas o, en el peor de los casos, en los próximos días.

Nos hemos desilusionado por nuestra oración debido a la expectativa que teníamos. Uno se desilusiona cuando recibe algo diferente a lo esperado. Pero si entendemos bien qué debemos esperar cuando oramos, entonces no solo la desilusión desaparecerá sino, que también podremos posicionarnos mejor para obtener la respuesta que buscábamos.

Tenemos que cambiar nuestra mentalidad de "LA RESPUESTA VENDRÁ" a "IR A TOMAR LA RESPUESTA". No dudo que haya ocasiones que "la respuesta viene" sin que nosotros movamos un dedo, pero normalmente no es así, sino que tú y tu Padre trabajan juntos.

En 2 Crónicas 20:17 nuestro Padre le dice a Josafat que "por esta vez ellos no tendrán que pelear". ¿Por qué les dice "por esta vez"? ¡Porque normalmente eran ellos los que peleaban!

En Marcos 11:24 Jesús dijo que todo lo que pidamos en oración, debemos creer que lo recibiremos, y vendrá. En mi post Cree que lo tomarás, y vendrá explico que la palabra griega que fue traducida como "recibir" en verdad significa "tomar". Por lo tanto, ¡Jesús está diciendo que todo lo que pidamos en oración, debemos creer que lo tomaremos, y lo obtendremos!

La oración no cambia a Dios, sino a nosotros. Hay que tener en claro que cuando oramos no estamos convenciendo a nuestro Padre que nos conceda lo que le pedimos. ¡Es imposible convencer a nuestro Padre de algo! Si es algo bueno lo que le estamos pidiendo, ¡Él ya lo quiere para nosotros! ¡Inclusive lo ha querido desde antes que nosotros y ha hecho más que nosotros para que podamos recibirlo! Y si es malo lo que le pedimos, ¡nunca lo convencerás!

¿De qué somos cambiados nosotros en cuando oramos? Principalmente de nuestra mentalidad de "RECIBIR LA RESPUESTA" a "TOMAR LA RESPUESTA".

Nuestro Padre siempre ha usado personas para hacer Su voluntad aquí en la tierra. Inclusive para salvar a la humanidad, tuvo que hacerse persona para eso, ¡y nació Jesús! Eso que le estás pidiendo a tu Padre Celestial en oración, no es más que una expresión de Su voluntad, porque recuerda y convéncete de esto: ¡LA VOLUNTAD DE TU PADRE CELESTIAL ES BENDECIRTE!

Entonces, ya que eso que le pides es de acuerdo a Su voluntad, usará a alguna persona para eso, y lo más seguro que esa persona seas tú.

Ese proceso de cambiar nuestra mentalidad de "RECIBIR" a "TOMAR", toma tiempo, pero inclusive si ya estamos convencidos que Él quiere bendecirnos, tomará tiempo el escuchar la dirección que nos da para ir a tomar la respuesta. Durante ese tiempo, seguramente habrán intentos fallidos, pero si no nos rendimos, tarde o temprano tomaremos nuestra respuesta.

Entendiendo esto, esa demora que experimentamos en la respuesta de nuestras oraciones es básicamente por:

1. Pensar que nosotros no haríamos nada, sino que todo lo haría nuestro Padre.

2. Demorar en convencernos que nosotros somos los principales medios que nuestro Padre usaría para que esa oración sea contestada.

3. Escuchar la dirección de nuestro Padre acerca de cómo tomar esa oración.

¿Qué le estás pidiendo a tu Padre Celestial? ¿Sanidad de alguna enfermedad, provisión para algún proyecto, restauración matrimonial, un viaje, un auto, más amigos? Esa respuesta a nuestra oración, esa tierra prometida, esa promesa hecha realidad, ¡es la voluntad de Padre porque Él te ama! ¡Y también quiere ayudarte a que las tomes!

¡Espero te haya ayudado!

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¡Haciendo click AQUÍ podrás encontrar más enseñanzas y consejos sobre la oración, la sanidad, matrimonios, padres, la gracia, liderazgo, entre muchos otras que te serán de bendición!

• ¿Bajo la Ley o Bajo la Gracia? ¿Qué es eso?: Aprende qué es estar bajo la Ley y bajo la Gracia, y que ¡estar bajo la Gracia es muuuucho mejor!
• Oración I: La Oración Flecha: Aprende que no necesitas una pose o palabras adecuadas para ser escuchado por tu Padre Celestial.
• ¿Le tengo que Decir a los Pecadores sus Pecados?: ¿Sólo porque es pecado se lo tengo que decir? ¿Qué hizo Jesús? ¡Averígualo aquí!
• Una forma de Maldecir a tu Hijos: Yo maldecía a mis hijos y no me daba cuenta. ¡No caigas en el mismo error!

Esconde a tus Hijos y Llénalos

La Biblia dice en Hebreos 11:23 en la versión Reina Valera que los padres de Moisés lo vieron como "un niño hermoso". Según la palabra que se usa en hebreo ("asteios"), quiere decir que lo vieron como un niño de la ciudad y, según el contexto, entendemos que se refiere a que los padres vieron a su hijo que no pertenecía donde ellos vivían, esto es, en la esclavitud, sino en la ciudad de Egipto.

Yo creo que esto es innato en la mayoría de padres: siempre quieren que sus hijos vayan más allá de lo que ellos han ido, que logren más de lo que ellos han logrado, que no vivan lo malo que ellos han vivido, que si ellos no han podido alcanzar sus sueños, quieren que sus hijos sí logren hacerlo. Y, ¿sabes qué?, ¡nuestro Padre Celestial no es la excepción!, porque Él, como padre que es, también quiere que Sus hijos alcancen todos sus sueños, y esto te incluye a ti y a tus hijos!

Pero, aquí está el secreto: los padres de Moisés lo escondieron de los ataques de faraón (Hebreos 11:23). Dice la Biblia que no tuvieron miedo de desobedecer la orden de faraón porque lo vieron hermoso, en otras palabras, debido a que sus padres estaban convencidos que su hijo estaba destinado para algo especial y que llegaría más allá de los que ellos han llegado, no tuvieron temor de ir contra la orden del Faraón y esconder a Moisés.

¿Qué ves en tus hijos? ¿Grandeza? ¿Un gran destino? ¿Que fueron hechos para algo especial? Yo creo firmemente que todo eso que sientes por ellos fue originado en el corazón de su verdadero Padre Celestial, que nuestro Padre puso en tu corazón como padre o madre un "vistazo" de su futuro, lo cual produjo en ti un convencimiento interno de que tus hijos fueron hechos para ser grandes.

La pregunta es, como padres, ¿qué podemos hacer para que nuestros hijos logren alcanzar esa grandeza? Creo que la respuesta la encontramos en el mismo versículo y ya lo habíamos mencionado: Esconder a nuestros hijos de los ataques del diablo, el cual usa el mundo como su forma de atacar (Juan 12:31). Quiero explicar esto:

Tú no puedes obligar a tus hijos a que cumplan con lo que Dios los ha llamado, pero sí puedes esconderlos de los ataques del mundo.

Dos cosas: Esconderlos y Llenarlos
Los padres de Moisés no lo obligaron a que se rehuse llamar "hijo de la hija del faraón" (Hebreos 11:24), sino que fue decisión propia de Moisés. Pero, ¿cómo llegó Moisés a tomar esa decisión? Dos razones: los padres de Moisés lo escondieron de lo malo y lo llenaron de lo bueno. Después de hacer eso, la decisión de Moisés de decidir por el camino correcto era algo casi inevitable.

Lo mismo es para nosotros como padres. Si queremos que nuestros hijos alcancen lo que nuestro Padre Celestial tiene para ellos tenemos que:

1. Esconderlos de todos los ataques del enemigo, y

2. Llenarlos del amor de Dios y su gracia.

Si hacemos esto, es prácticamente un hecho que decidirán por lo correcto y, por ende, cumplirán con lo que nuestro Padre tiene para ellos.

¿Cómo esconder a tus hijos del mal?
Esto se hace principalmente en oración (Mateo 6:13). No dejes de orar por ellos para que sean librados del mal, protegidos de cualquier mala influencia, que todo plan contra ellos sea desbaratado. Ora por sus futuros, matrimonios, negocios, ministerios. Nunca te canses de orar por ellos porque la oración es siempre escuchada. No importa si conociste a Jesús cuando tus hijos eran ya grandes, porque nuestro Padre Celestial puede tornar todo lo malo en bueno y recuperar todo lo perdido. ¡Confía en Él! ¡Deposita tus cargas en Él!

¡No cargues con la preocupación de tus hijos, porque nuestra preocupación, en la mayoría de casos, solo nubla nuestro pensamiento y obstruye el obrar de nuestro Padre! Recuerda que tus hijos son más hijos que nuestro Padre Celestial que tuyos, y Él los ama más que tú y sabe cuidar de ellos mejor que tú. ¡Ora por ellos y confía en Él!

Ahora, para esconder a tus hijos de los ataques del diablo como lo hicieron los padres de Moisés, no podrás hacerlo si tus hijos ya tienen una edad en la que ya no puedes decidir ciertas cosas por ellos. No es lo mismo que decidas qué programas de TV pueden ver cuando tienen 5 años a que cuando tienen 15. Tienes que tener sabiduría (¡y para eso es la oración y los consejos!) para saber qué puedes decidir por ellos y qué no. Llegará el momento en que qué amigos tener, con quién casarse, qué libros leer, dónde trabajar, etc., escapará de tus decisiones. No siempre podrás esconderlos del mundo, pero mientras que puedas, con sabiduría y mucha oración, hazlo.

Pero ojo, si no tienes el discernimiento de saber cuando dejar de esconderlos de ciertas cosas, pueda que ese método termine produciendo un resultado contrario al que buscabas y terminen, más bien, alejándose de Dios. Los padres de Moisés lo escondieron hasta cierto punto, pero después tuvieron que confiar en Dios y soltaron a Moisés. ¡Y dio resultado!

¿Cómo llenar a tus hijos de Su amor y Su gracia?
Esto se hace principalmente con tu ejemplo. Nuestros hijos no siempre serán obedientes, pero siempre serán buenos imitadores. La mayoría de nosotros hacemos lo que hacemos, sea bueno o malo, porque fue inculcado en nosotros. ¿Podemos cambiar lo malo? ¡Claro que sí!, pero es a través de otro proceso de inculcar.

Si tú conociste a Jesús cuando tus hijos ya eran grandes y, por lo tanto, ya les inculcaste cosas malas en ellos, no esperes que te escuchen porque ahora ya sigues a Jesús. ¡Nunca dejes de predicarles, pero no siempre uses tus palabras! Tu ejemplo, tu testimonio, el cambio que ellos vean en ti, será la mejor manera que ellos VEAN que existe un Dios que los ama y no los condena. Ellos verán el cómo respondes, tus gestos, tu disposición a ayudar, que antes eras de una manera, pero ahora eres de otra manera. Esto es super efectivo, pero demanda que tú primero vivas el mensaje que quieres que ellos reciban.

Si son pequeños, lo mejor que puedes hacer por ellos es llevarlos a la iglesia. ¡Ora y busca una iglesia  en donde reine el amor, la gracia y la aceptación de nuestro Padre Celestial! Huye de aquellas iglesias que te exigen obediencia para sentirte digno de las bendiciones de tu Padre Celestial. Sé parte de una iglesia en donde se inculque el cambiar como producto de conocer el amor y la gracia de Jesús, porque si tú te llenas solo de mensajes que te dicen: "¡Tienes que obedecer! ¡Tienes que obedecer! ¡Tienes que obedecer!", eso estarás transmitiendo a tus hijos y, tarde o temprano, se hartarán de ello, o terminarán viviendo una vida legalista basada en el temor, y ello no los llevará a cumplir con lo que nuestro Padre Celestial tiene pare ellos.

No te canses de llenarlos de palabras del amor y la gracia de Jesús. Aun si son pequeños bebés, porque recuerda que la Palabra de Dios es espiritual, y será tu espíritu que se comunica con su espíritu. Además, si los padres de Moisés solo tuvieron 3 meses para llenarlo de lo que ellos conocían de Dios, y aun así dio resultado, ¡cuánto más dará resultado con tus hijos si tú que tienes Biblia, iglesia y no solo 3 meses para hacer eso! Y mientras crezcan y tus palabras sigan siendo recibidas, ¡sigue hablándoles!, siempre con el discernimiento de no llegar a obligarlos.

Entonces, los padres de Moisés no tuvieron temor de ir contra las ordenes de faraón porque vieron algo especial en su hijo, así que lo escondieron, lo llenaron de las palabras de Dios y luego supieron dejarlo ir. ¡Tenemos que hacer lo mismo! Oremos para aprender cómo esconder a nuestros hijos del mal, cómo llenarlos de las Palabras de nuestro Padre y luego, saber cómo dejarlos ir. ¡Nuestro Padre Celestial estará con nosotros en cada paso!

¡Espero te haya ayudado!

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Podrás encontrar más buenas y prácticas enseñanzas para padres en este link: Enseñanzas para Padres

Rebuke the Wind and the Sea will Appease

The account of Jesus calming the storm is told mentioning a detail in particular in the Gospel of Mark: that Jesus didn't rebuke the sea, but the wind (Mark 4:39). This is because the wind was what provoked the big waves that covered the boat. In other words, Jesus dealt with the cause of the problem and not just with the problem itself.

The disciples weren't afraid of the furious wind but of the waves, because the waves swamped the boat (Mark 4:37) and they could sink and drown. The disciples looked at the raising waves and how they fell on the boat and their hearts filled with fear. They didn't looked at the invisible force behind the raising of the sea waves, but their focus was on the sea. Jesus didn't only deal with the problem (the waves), but also with the cause of it (the wind).

Check what Mark 4:37 says in the New King James Version, "And a great windstorm arose." Jesus knew what the real essence of the storm was: the wind. The disciples didn't. They thought that their only problem was the sea waves. They didn't realize that if Jesus didn't rebuke the wind and just said to the wind to be calmed, it was just matter of time for the waves to raise up again. That's why He rebuked the wind first, and then calmed the sea.

Have you recognize what is the real essence of the storm you go through? Maybe you're only watching "the waves that fall on your boat" which fill you up with fear, but don't see what provoke those waves. Maybe you say:
- My problem is my son's nightmares, but you don't focus on what causes those nightmares.
- My problem is my debts, but you don't focus on the bad habits that cause those debts.
- My problem is the estrangement with my spouse, but you don't focus on what causes that estrangement.
- My problem is that I'm sickly, but you don't focus on your eating habits and lack of exercises that cause those sicknesses.
- Etc., etc., etc.

Proverbs 26:2 states that causeless curse doesn't come. Rather than bury yourself in the symptoms, deal with the cause of them. Stop wasting time and energy solving the same problem again and again, and rather use that time and energy to deal with the causes of that problem.

Maybe you've been dealing for long time only with the problem, but not with the cause of it. That's why it constantly appears! If you want to get rid of that problem once and for all, ask for help to your heavenly Father so that He may help you to recognize what you are doing or maybe what you are expose to, which provokes the problem, and of course, ask wisdom to finally get rid of it.

Hope this may helped you!

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I'm sure that these following links about more faith and grace teachings will help you:

• Believe that You'll TAKE it, and it'll Come: Learn how to receive what you are asking God for.
• Rest from Yourself: Learn that we should stop trying to win our good Heavenly Father's favor, and just rest.
• Focus on what your Heavenly Father Does: Sometimes we think that God is solving the problems that the devil makes, but it's actually the opposite way: the devil is trying to ruin the blessings that God has created for you.

3 Steps to Become a Good Failure

I want to share to you three advices that, no doubts, will take you to failure. Remember that all good failure people do regularly what successful people almost never do. All good failure person make excuses, listen to everybody and plan nothing. Therefore, if you want to be a failure all your life, don't stop keeping this advices!

1. Make Excuses

Not all is your fault, so why do you have to take responsibility of everything that happens to you? Do you make the decisions of the government? Did you plan that bad thing that happened to you, that marked you and that prevented you emotionally and/or physically? Is it your fault that that man, woman, boss, coworkers, are the way they are? Of course not!

Stop listening to those that encourage you all the time because it's for sure than they didn't go through the things you did. You are the sorry, poor and pitiful person that deserves the help of all! They don't! Surely they grew up favored by destiny and will never understand your situation.

So, every time you got the chance to improve in some area, remember that you have the right to make an excuse for not to do so. What you have to do is to wait for the perfect conditions so just then to do something.


2. Listen to Everybody

Unless you want to be a hermit and exile yourself to a desert island, you have to start to compare yourself to everybody. Don't be self sufficient and proud to think that you are alright. Why to listen to only wise people, to the ones that care for you and to the ones that have obtained success? What kind of discrimination is that? This isn't a monarchy nor a dictatorship. We live in democracy!, and in such everybody deserves to be listened.

Therefore, you have to start listening to ALL your critics, to all of those that like to opine comfortably seated in their seats but they'd never be willing to play in the field, to all of those envy people that love to have what you have, to all those socia media trolls that spend five hours daily behind a screen applying their gift of criticizing others. Listen to them all!, unless that you believe that you are better that them.

And, of course, try to please everybody. Stop being selective about serving Jesus! Jesus said that we have to love are neighbor as ourselves (Matthew 22:39) and that we have to do good to all (Galatians 6:10), didn't He?


3. Do not Plan

Plans are the modern invention of the self called "leadership and motivation masters" to maintain you slaved, and God wants you to live in freedom! (Galatians 5:13).

Short, mid and long-term plans? What's it for?, you won't fulfill their deadlines anyways and the only thing that this will be useful for is to make you feel bad and condemned, and then you'll be buying books about how to be free from condemnation, surely written by the same authors!

Living in freedom, guided by the Holy Spirit to where He wants to take you is much better! Leave now those plans to loose weigh, those goals to learn another language, that exercise routine and all of those planning nonsense that the only thing they are good is for taking your freedom.


Keep it up!
If you've been following these advices, surely your life heads to failure. Keep it up! Don't Stop! And if you've not followed them, surely your life is becoming into one of those weird exceptions where, in time, everything turn out well. But, why do you want to be the exception? Why do you want to live alone? Join the great family of failure people of all around the world and I promise that "loneliness" is something that you'll never feel!

PD: Yeap, I was being ironic =), but with much love!

Do exactly the opposite and you will surely obtain success in all the areas of life!

Hope it helps!

A TOP Marriage

Is your marriage to the fullest? Do you enjoy it? I want to share with you three ingredients to enjoy a TOP Marriage.

T - Time Together
Nowadays it's so easy to keep oneself busy. It's weird to have a free morning. Even vacations are busy, that's why we come back from them tired! We take, without realizing, this lifestyle to our marriage with grave consequences.
Remember that, after God's, your time with your spouse is the most important thing. You have to understand (because we haven't been taught so) to set time apart to spend it with him/her. THAT'S PRIORITY. THAT'S URGENT. Everything else, including your children, job and the rest of your family, cannot occupy the time that's meant ONLY for your spouse.
Get a time aside weekly: a Monday night, a Sunday morning, a Friday afternoon, etc., in which he/she will know that you both will be together. That not only will strengthen the communication between you and your spouse, but also it'll make him/her feel more important.
There will be moments where there may be exception to the rule for something that comes up, but if those exceptions become often, do not deceive yourself, and recognize that you're not giving him/her the time he/she deserves. Who decides if the exception already became often? Your spouse!

O - On Prayer
A while ago I heard a statistic of divorce in the United States that said: 3 out of 5 marriages end up divorcing, but if the couple starts to attend a church, the divorce probability goes down to 2 out of 5. But if the couple not only attend the church, but it gets involved, and also take courses for marriages and seek some counsel, the divorce rate reduces to 1 out of 5. BUT if the husband and the wife pray together regularly, 1 out of 1250 couples get divorce!
And not only praying together will keep you from divorce, but also, among its many blessings, it is the key to a much deeper intimacy with your spouse and the place where our loving heavenly Father pour out of His wisdom and direction for the problems you may face, and vision for you two, as a couple, may take what He has for you.

P - Purpose to Forgive
If you want to enjoy your marriage to the fullest, you won't be able to do it if you don't learn to use the weapon of forgiveness. And I told you that you won't be able, not because I'm pessimist, but because there is a reality: as much you as your spouse are imperfect; therefore, sooner or later, and more often than you think, you two will be offending each other. That's why you have to purpose to forgive.
Forgiveness is a weapon of personal defense. It's for you. It'll take care of your heart. It'll protect it. Purpose to forgive constantly! The more you forgive, more protected you will be. If you only forgive when a big offense comes up, it'll be difficult for you to do it, you'll make excuses, you won't know to forgive. That's why you have to forgive even the small and everyday offenses.
A successful marriage is not composed of people that never hurt each other, but of two persons that learnt to forgive each other.

If you practice these three ingredients and make them yours to get a TOP Marriage, people will say eventually about your marriage: "How lucky they were to have a marriage like this!", and then you will be able to answer: "It wasn't luck, it cost me a lot of work, but my Jesus never left me."

Hope this helped you! 😉

Do not Turn Off your Kid's Imagination

Many times, as a father, I've focused more on "the orden and neatness" of my kids than others more important things, such as, their imagination. Order has to be at the service of imagination and not in the other way around, because imagination gives you the goal, and order helps you to get there. When I realize this, I felt so bad as a father, because it was like I gave them a car, but they don't have a place to go, and that, in time, make the order becomes a goal in itself.

The picture illustrates perfectly this message. I recognize that a "go-order-your-room!" still comes out of my mouth before I ask them what there was in their imagination. Thanks be to my lovely Father for His grace because I really need it!, because He reminds me not only to ask them first for what they were imagining, but also makes me to be interested in what they are telling me: in the galactic war that took place in their room, in the martial tournament with new characters, in that aventure with a superhero, etc., so that they may grow with the confidence of what they imagine isn't nonsense.

AND AT THE END, after making sure that what was in their mind was important, I help them to form one of the tools that will help them in the future to materialize their imagination: order.

Our kids have a great imagination. Let us not turn it off! That imagination will turn into dreams and goals, which will make their lives to make sense and they'll feel fulfilled as persons. Our job as parents, is to give them the tools that will help them to reach those dreams that our heavenly Father will put in their hearts!

"Imagination is the preview of life's coming attractions" 

"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge, but imagination" 

"Imagination is more important that knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world" 

Albert Einstein

Hope it helps! 

The best way to stop doing the wrong

Do you want to change? Do you want to stop doing the wrong that you know you have to quit doing? Surely you've tried for long time to quit that addiction, that bad habit, to change that personality trait that has brought you so many problems, but without good results. I'm gonna give you now the way to stop doing the wrong thing: Do good.

No kidding! The best way to stop doing wrong is doing good!

It's not about of just trying to stop doing wrong things, but of doing good things. That bad habit has to be replaced by other in order for it to disappear, and what's better than by a good habit!

This is not about of just resisting doing bad things. Waiting for that moment of anxiety to come wherein temptation already started to take over the will, just to start saying: "I won't do it! I won't do it! I won't do it!", is an 100% inefficient way. The best way is NEVER ALLOW THAT DESIRE TO START GROWING.

If you analyze the daily life of a person with a bad habit, you'll note that it's all designed for that bad habit to appear and to flourish. That bad habit or addiction didn't just all of a sudden appear out of the thin air with no reason, but it flourished because it's fed by the many decisions that are made in a daily basis. That's why that the best way to be free from that wrong habit is creating a new one.

It's not about to stop doing wrong, but to do good.

It's not a new decision you have to make, but a bunch of it. You have to re-design your life style. It's nonsense to think that doing the same thing you'll obtain different results. That's why your decisions have to aim to create a new life style. For example, make the decision to practice a sport, to create a new group of friends, to take classes of something new, to assist more to your church, to be part of a small group in it, to actively participate in the events it organizes, etc. This kind of decisions will be changing your life style, using the time you used before to cultivate that bad habit to create a new and good one, you'll be surrounding yourself with people that will naturally help you to go to that new direction because they are going to that same direction!

By doing so, in time, you'll realize that you won't be worrying for not doing that bad thing, but for doing new good things. You'll note that bad thing you used to do will be a past thing, you won't remember how you quit doing it, because your focus will have changed, because you won't be worried on destroying the bad thing, but on building a good one.

I hope this may helped you!